Are you secure in God’s calling, strength, and purpose for you? Or, Is your life and ministry swayed by your insecurity?

Here are 10 signs that our ministry (and lives), are swayed by insecurity:

1. Our days begin with a long list of tasks that focus on keeping others happy, rather than seeking God’s affirmation.
2. We constantly compare ourselves to other youth workers or the youth ministry down the street.
3. We say “Yes” to every event and program idea: We are scared that by saying no, we might lose popularity.
4. We can’t miss a phone call at any time of the day: If we do, it eats us alive to wonder what the call was about.
5. We would rather be good friends with students, rather than being a solid leader to them.
6. We regularly lose sleep when students, leaders, and parents disagree or disapprove of us.
7. We constantly complain to friends about the latest conflict or disagreement in hopes to gain support and affirmation.
8. We feel defeated and devastated when an event or program doesn’t quite live up to what we and others hoped, (rather than seeing it as an opportunity to grow and learn).
9. We have a tendency to fish for compliments from others, and are fueled (and ruled), by their affirmations.
10. We feel distant from God and feel a lack of security and confidence in Him (and His promises…)

If you are like me, there are many things on this list that I relate to. I have times when I feel confident and secure, and then there are times when I feel desperate and insecure in myself and my ministry.

I know this might be completely obvious, but who are we trying to please?

As you go through your day, consider your motivations, your decisions, and your feelings. Are they driven by the intense need to keep others happy, or are you striving to please God and let his leading bring fruit to your life and ministry? I know this might seem so obvious, but it’s one of the greatest issues I see in leadership in churches today.

Are we really living to please God, or living for the approval of others? Are we allowing insecurity to define our lives and ministries?

What would you add to this list? What are some of the indicators that your ministry and life is defined by insecurity?

Phil <><

This is part-two of a two-part series looking at burnout in youth ministry. 

Since I wouldn’t stop, God shut me down.  He stopped me totally in my tracks. If I don’t get enough sleep now I am sick for 3 days.  I MUST sleep. If I don’t exercise, my muscles stiffen up and I can’t move.  I HAVE to work out daily. I have suffered from a stomach problem for 13 years (non burnout related.)   It is exasperated by stress and poor eating habits.  I HAVE TO EAT WELL.

God literally stopped me.  He said ENOUGH is ENOUGH.  I am not saying that the Lord laughed at me.  Instead FOR ME,  I couldn’t/wouldn’t listen.  So He gave me signs to help.  As I mentioned yesterday,  I know others that have come under the weight of similar afflictions.

I have come to see when I don’t listen,  the Lord grabs my attention.   He wants me with him in this for the long haul.

My friendly advice to you is to put some safety in place BEFORE you fall.  We were not created to run and run and run.  The Lord didn’t rest on the 7th day because he needed it.  He never “sleeps nor slumbers.”  He sat down to remind us, humans, that we should.  Jesus didn’t steal away for a moment with the Father out of obligation.  This was the very moment that would renew him and fill him up for all that was ahead.  It was his lifeline to recall the vision to which he was called.   Our lives truly are about BEING with our God.  This is why we serve him.   There are moments when we get the order wrong.  At these times there needs to be a correction.

What Do We Do?

For those of us can’t stop how do we remember that we have to.   God didn’t give everyone the thorn in his side he has given me.  I can safely say those happened because I wouldn’t listen.  Jacob limped for a lifetime after he wrestled with God.  It was a reminder of who ultimately won the match.

1.  Know the signs:

According to Cathy Gates director of Transformation Leadership International there are three telling signs that we are headed for a breakdown:

• Emotional and physical exhaustion: You feel worn out physically and emotionally. You have no energy; feel depleted, debilitated and fatigued.
• Depersonalized response toward others: You find yourself displaying negative or inappropriate attitudes toward people. Your sense of idealism disappears. You are irritated by others much more easily.
• Reduced sense of personal accomplishment: You experience reduced productivity and low morale. You find yourself withdrawing from your responsibilities and from others. Your ability to cope with day to day stress is significantly decreased.

2.  Accountability that you will listen to.

We know that pornography addiction, affairs and finding a vice are growing at staggering rates for those in ministry.  My belief is because we find no healthy outlet,  forget who Christ is in our lives,  and become isolated.   Find accountability partners that you can be honest with and talk to.  Find someone who does what you do in another ministry.  Find people who get you.  This may take some work to find this one or two people,  but find them.  Then listen to their advice.  If they tell you to take a day off then do it.   Truth only sounds trite because it is simple. Make a friend.  Make the effort.

3.  Create boundaries.

The hardest thing for me was to actually start shutting my phone off.  When I can’t,  on those days that it should be off,  but I know I will check it,  I hand it off to someone else to hold.  I get it away from myself.   I make my husband put a vacation, days off and weekends with just the two of us on the calendar.  These are purposeful. I turned 40 a couple of weeks ago.  My hubby asked what I wanted.  “A week away with you, “ was my answer.  We go away in two weeks.  It will be close to home.  It won’t be extravagant.  It will be 5 glorious days of just he and I.  He knew this was so important that he asked all of my friends to chip in for the cause.  I can’t wait! If people stomp on the lines you draw,  learn to say no.  It was my hardest lesson,  and the most beneficial.  Take time for you with God,  for friends,  and for family.

4.  Remember the ways you love to connect with Jesus and be intentional.

I connect with Jesus through music.  Yesterday,  I sat and did something I hadn’t done in a long while.  I sat on my couch.  I put in my headphones.  I closed my eyes.  I sang along.  I love that.  It refreshes me.  When I sit outside and just am a part of God’s creation I am reminded of his power and magnificence.  Sometimes I stop and take in the thunder storm and look at the sky.  Other times I sit at the beach and just stare into the water.  I look to these times.  My love affair with my Savior must last a lifetime.  What do you do that reminds you, you are connected to the Lord?

 5.  Do something you like to do- but don’t have to do.

I adore being active. Living where we do,  snorkeling is a favorite pass time.  As often as I can I get to the beach and get on my mask.  Do you play the guitar, but it has sat in the corner for a month?  Pick it up.  I write.  Almost daily.  No one expects it.  I just like it.  What do you like to do?  Talk?  Drink coffee?  Shop?  Water ski?  Sometimes we might need to be creative in time and energy to make it happen.   Make it happen.

Most of all I want you to know:  You are not alone.  I have been there.  Others have too.  Lay down the guilt and ask for help.

The fight to “Go! GO! GO!”  never ceases. Yesterday, I went for a hair cut.  I didn’t want to take the time.  I like my hairdresser and an hour of stupid small talk was actually good for me.  This rainy Saturday we spent the day lazing around the house. John and I laid around and laughed and did a whole lot of nothing.  This week I have felt compelled to get things done.  The old demons of running have been nipping at my heels.  I have had to beat them off with a stick.   Somedays are still like that…  For all of us.

Bottom line is simple but not easy. Make the choice for change.  If you need someone to talk to today- reach out.  I am here.  In addition check out Simply Soul Care.  This article- you and me.  It’s the reason it is exists.

This is part-one of a two-part series on youth ministry burnout. 

I could not believe that this ministry veteran was telling my story.  Years of serving  and then one day the weight crushed him. Us “Type A,” personalities are wound tight. On a good day. We are workaholics, especially when it is something that we really believe in. Our minds are always racing.  We never “shut off.”   We are moving and moving and if you aren’t coming with us then well,  get out-of-the-way. We don’t thrive at “days off.”  Vacations can be a hard sell.   We eat too much or live off of an IV of coffee.  Actually, we feel guilty when we do things for “ourselves.”  (I recently used a gift certificate I received for a facial… a year and a half a go).  It feels like when I do “take time” things just blow up anyway.

Eventually we run ourselves into the ground.  I have sat in my bed sick with pneumonia and continued on getting done what needs to be done.

This can resonate with those outside of ministry.  Add the fact that we are “doing it all for Jesus,”  and we are compelled to do it all for his glory.   After all aren’t we told that we must “finish the race well.” We are pressing into that heavenly prize.  We want to be told that we were “good and faithful servants,” on that day when we stand before our Lord face to face.  Therefore,  why on earth would we want to stop at all?

Friends and family tell you that you out to slow down.  They can see the stress building.  They are worried about you.  What can you do?  When they tell you to “make a change” it is simply not helpful.  Look at our personality test.  This is in our DNA.  Pioneers who have to chop through the wilderness can’t stop.

Yes there were moments of reprieve.  My husband reminded me that he and the kids were getting lost in the shuffle of my ministry OCD.  I listened.  Then I would change for a little while. I would say,  “It’s not what I do,  it’s who I do it for.”  Yet, my personality would rise again.  The cycle would begin again,  only worse.  In my guilt I was now juggling everything while refusing to let anything to drop,  except myself.   I made sure my children had time.  My husband had time. I would read my Bible daily out of obligation.  Anyone who called,  I answered.   I was the person who always showed up.  Always took care of everyone and everything.  All the time.

Then one day we wake up, sick, (really can’t get out of bed sick). We think we are dying.  I know it happened to me.  It started with an inability to focus.   My chest was tight and I couldn’t breath.  For a week I had a tingling in my hands and feet. My legs would go numb. I couldn’t drive or think straight.  Others I know suffered from extreme insomnia.  One friend had partial temporary paralysis in his face.  It feels like the flu or cancer or something major.

We go to the doctor.  The tests find something minor, maybe anemia.  They test and test. Finally the diagnosis.  Depression.  Panic Attacks. As the veteran told the story of his bodily shut down,  I thought I was the only one.  This is different from an actual stand alone ailment.  The impetus for this is an emotional break

Burnout is what we would call it.  One youth pastor told me,  ”I never thought that I could get burnt out doing what I love for whom I love.” We feel like there is no one to tell.  Conjuring up in our mind that our friends and family will laugh and mock,  ”I told you so.”   Those we minister to want more of our time not less.  We don’t know how to fix this.  We have no idea how to slow down. Honestly,  if someone takes a responsibility away we simply create a new one for ourselves.

There was my former pastor who told me if I just understood that the Sabbath wasn’t a day off it was a lifestyle I would be fine.  ”Jesus never took a day off,  he simply stole away for a moment,”  was what he said.  So I would take the time and  sit with God.  While my mind raced with all that there was to do.  Honestly,  the “moments”  just got lumped into the “to do” list as well.

According to an Aug1, 2010 article in the New York Times:

“Members of the clergy now suffer from obesity, hypertension and depression at rates higher than most Americans. In the last decade, their use of antidepressants has risen, while their life expectancy has fallen. Many would change jobs if they could.”

Burnout statistics  for those in ministry show: 

• 40% of those in ministry and 47% of spouses are suffering from burnout, frantic schedules, and/or unrealistic expectations.
• My husband gets at least one phone call from the ministry on his “day off.”  This past week we were on vacation during which he received both phone calls and texts the whole week.  We often fall into bed at night after having juggled all there is to do.
•  45% of pastors say that they’ve experienced depression or burnout to the extent that they needed to take a leave of absence from ministry.
• I spoke with two different youth pastors from two different areas of the country yesterday who both took a year off.
•  70% don’t have any close friends.
•  All of my closest friends live hundreds of miles away,  as do my husband’s friends.  We speak by phone maybe once a month and email every so often and mostly text.   We sit at home with no energy to make new friends or be the ones who pursue friendship.   Our greatest complaint in ministry is usually loneliness.
• 90% feel unqualified or poorly prepared for ministry. According to studies it is one of the top 3 reasons people leave ministry.
• 94% feel under pressure to have a perfect family.
• One of the reasons that close friends are so hard,  is the pressure to be perfect.  People seem to get near and say things like,  ”Why is your youngest so strong-willed,  you are supposed to be an example.”
•  90% work more than 50 hours a week. (I would say most of us feel like we are always working).
•  1,500 pastors leave their ministries each month due to burnout, conflict, or moral failure.
•  The average tenure for a youth pastor is about 18 months.

As I sit here I want to keep telling you the stories.  I want you to know as you feel like this that you are not alone.  Those days when you just can’t “get happy,” others of us have been there too.  This is my story.  I don’t know how to get off the crazy roller coaster.  I know I have to,  but when I am at my lowest is when I am least able to listen to advice.   Tell me do you ever struggle with burn out too?

Today I wanted you to chew on how you really feel.  Take 3 minutes today and be honest with the Lord.  Are you tired?  Are you worn out?  Go to God and “be still,” for just a second.

Tomorrow we will tackle a solution.

Leneita 

The previous two posts were pretty in depth and full of information, but today I want to be brief with this idea:

An effective youth worker is constantly planning ahead at least one season.

In terms of events, calendar and programs, it is imperative that we are working at least 2-3 months ahead of where we are. For me, I call it a season. As I write this post, my whole summer calendar is published even though here in Michigan we are barely touching the Spring. It’s so important that we work 2-3 months ahead for a number of reasons:

1) Parents Need The Information: If we want parents to support our ministries we should be getting dates to them at least 2-3 months ahead. For missions trips, however, most parents will thank you if you give them the date 6-9 months out.

2) Volunteers Can Plan Better: If you want volunteers at special events and retreats, they need to book time off and make your program a priority. If you are working a month out, don’t expect to get any support.

3) Your Church Staff Will Thank You: By planning a season ahead, you will avoid many of the typical church calendar clashes that often occur when we add dates to the calendar at last minute.

4) You Can Plan Better: Once you get into the mode of working a season ahead of where you are, you can give events and programs more time for creativity and implementation of good ideas.

Working last minute will often result in last ditch efforts.

I also find that I have time to percolate on ideas, messages, and events over a couple months. By the time I get to that season, some of my ideas have grown into the unimaginable.

How are you planning ahead? Are you barely making it? What ideas, events, or messages could benefit from seasonal planning?

Phil <><

Today, I want to encourage you to consider how you can gain healthy respect and influence with the parents in our ministries. As many of you know, having parents “on our side” can make or break the success of our ministries. Below are three things that when consistently worked on, will help us gain healthy respect and influence with parents in my ministry.

1) Set An Example And Stay The Course: This is perhaps the most effective way of gaining healthy respect and influence with any group of people in our church. Parents entrust their kids to us on a daily basis and it’s important that they see someone who is setting a consistent Godly example. It’s easy to get frustrated when people don’t give us time of day, but it’s also important to realize that trust takes time to build. Being a solid and consistent example will bear much fruit in time… Getting frustrated and defensive with parents will only go to confirm any negative ideas they might already have about youth workers… Set an example and stay the course…

2) Communicate, Communicate, Communicate: Parents are crazy busy with their kids schedules aren’t they? If you don’t realize this already, just consider the amount of times you get asked “repeat questions” about events and programs. Parents often don’t remember because they are so busy… It’s no reflection on you, it’s simply the reality for busy parents these days. Therefore, in my ministry, I make it my goal to over-communicate with my parents! It’s also key for me is to use different modes of communication and ensure that I give parents LOTS of lead-time before an event. Communicating effectively goes a long way to gain parent cheerleaders who will one day become your greatest advocates…

3) Recruit Parents To Be Your “Eyes and Ears”: Take time to consider who can help you see through the eyes of a parent…But, make sure you you pick a cheerleader type who will balance honesty with encouragement. Give them full permission to point out any areas of weakness in your program that could be improved to help their kids or other parents. I have learned so much from these types of parents and I have won respect when I take time to listen to their ideas and opinions.

There are many more things I could add to this list, but these are the ones I try to focus on the most. What have you found to be successful in gaining healthy respect and influence with parents?

Phil <><

Not in our marriage. We have had a unique expedition into serving the Lord. Leneita is the crazed overly passionate, “We can do anything” voice, while John is the calm, reasonable, “Sounds good, but how will we accomplish it,”  voice. It used to make us roll our eyes as the husband would look at Leneita and say we are just alike. It made John feel emasculated that he was more like the ministry “wives.”

Ministry is challenging. Then you add marriage to the mix and it simply complicates everything. In our case neither of us even has a “real” job (or so we have heard them called.) to support the cause. Instead, we have walked hand in hand down this road of fully focused, all in, running youth min stuff 24/7 for almost 15 years now.

Here are 3 things that have helped our marriage:

1. We were BOTH called. In our life we have the interesting perspective that our whole family is “in ministry” together. We live in the inner city as missionaries and serve on staff with a ministry. Our lives are immersed into the vision. Yet, we recognize it wasn’t one or the other of us following the other. The Lord made us “one flesh” this means that this call was for both of us. In your life it might look different. One of you may hold down a non “church” job. One of you might stay at home with the kids. However, the Lord wants you unified in his vision for your life. Serving in youth ministry is part of that.

 2. We are called to be who God called US to be. Expectations from others was what brought rifts into our marriage. In the early years we kept trying to make it look like what we defined as the “norm.” This brought a constant sense of uneasiness to our relationship. I’ll never forget the day I heard a young, stay at home, homeschool mom, say to me, “I could never do what you do, I just support my husband as a youth guy.” I told her, “You aren’t supposed to do it our way. You are supposed to do it the way the Lord made YOU as a family.” If you are not sinning in any way and you are happy with the way your marriage is working, stop trying to fix it. It isn’t broken.

 3. “Doing” ministry can never be as important as your relationship. We all say, God first, family second, everything else third. I have also heard it said, “God only.” Our identity can’t be in what you do, it has to be in who you are in the Lord. HOWEVER, when the Lord gives you a spouse that relationship needs care. There is never a “good day,” to take off. There is never a day that the phone calls, text and demands of those you serve will end. If you keep telling your spouse, “they just need to understand this is important,” there will come a day when they won’t anymore. The most important relationships need nurturing. You were called together. Even if your stint in “ministry” ended tomorrow, you will still be together, don’t forget that.

Honestly, when we were both single and “doing ministry” it was relatively easy. The only people we had to care about were Jesus and everyone else. The reality was that the Lord gave us a traveling companion on this life with him. The day we said, “I do” it meant that we would walk it all together, whatever life brings. For today, that means we get to tell kids how to live for Christ… as a couple.

What has helped your marriage in youth ministry? What is essential to continue growing together as one or both or you minister to students? 

John & Leneita

PLAYING THE COMPARISON GAME: So often students, parents, and leaders are hurting from the loss of the previous youth worker that they will naturally compare us with the previous person. The LAST thing we should be doing is joining in to play the comparison game too! It can become a dangerous and unhealthy foundation to build in our first year. Here’s what the comparison game can cause us to do:

• We change who we are to keep others happy while we are not fulfilled ourselves…
• We become defensive when we are compared to the last person and end up “bashing” the guy or gal before us…
• We change our vision and priorities to keep others happy and continue what others thought was successful…
• We can become frustrated when we change who we become frustrated in working toward a vision that is not ours…

THE REALITY OF THE COMPARISON GAME: Let’s be honest, every good youth worker should be creating a strong connection with their students, leaders, and parents. Therefore, we need to expect that people will have a natural tendency to miss the previous person and talk about them a great deal. Often a comparison statement is communicating “I miss the previous person, and you are not him or her.” This is natural and normal, but it’s important that we fight the urge to change who we are or take it too personally when we are compared…

HOW TO WIN THE COMPARISON GAME: 

• Embrace your unique gifts and strengths: You are not the last person! God created you with specific gifts and a specific personality. Seek God’s assurance of your uniqueness and calling and cling to Him for affirmation. Living for the affirmation of others can be a dangerous path to walk down in any ministry.
• Communicate your unique gifts and strengths to others: Without comparing yourself to the previous person, make sure that people are under no illusions as to who you are and what you stand for, (let them know your weaknesses too). Sometimes it’s good to state the obvious and deal with the elephant in the room. Students might be thinking you are ‘different’, so why not verbalize who you are and celebrate that publicly!
• Don’t “bash” the previous person: Often when new youth workers feel defensive about who they are, it’s easy to go on the attack and try to expose the weaknesses of the previous person in order to elevate themselves. This only goes to show massive insecurity on our part. Be committed to compliment all that has gone before you, (even if you see many weaknesses).
• Relax! It all takes time! There will come a day when you will feel accepted by your new church, (it won’t be ‘new’ then), but for now this is simply a season you are walking through. It’s so important to realize this season will not last forever… And here’s the really good news:  The more you can relax and be you, the more you will help others relax with who you are… 

LISTEN FIRST: A commitment I have made in my last two positions was to move slowly and take time to understand the people and programs first. In my opinion, we should be committed to not making any major changes in the first year, (only tweaking what has been done in the past). This is easier said than done, but it’s important to glean important insights, learn good lessons, and most importantly build trust with leaders, students, and parents.

RELATIONSHIPS: No matter what happens in our first year, we cannot forget that relationships are at the core of everything we should be doing. In a new position it’s so easy to get task focused, but we cannot get too busy to build relationships…  After the first year it will be solid relationships that will make you and your students want to achieve greater things together… 

GIVE THEM TIME: Give students, leaders, and parents time to get to know you! Take a deep breath and realize that healthy relationships and authentic community will all take time. Many are likely still hurting from a massive relational loss from their pervious youth worker moving on. They might also be hurting from a difficult parting of ways with the previous youth worker? Don’t be surprised or offended when your new church talks about the past and dreams about what was. Often, I have heard youth workers complain about their new church not getting on board with them quickly enough. It takes a good 12-18 months (in my opinion), to start to foster healthy and authentic relationships and feel like people are accepting us fully.

GIVE YOURSELF TIME: Don’t be unrealistic about how long it takes to build relationships, build momentum, and help disengaged students engage into your ministry. So often there is a slowing of momentum when a youth worker leaves and it’s imperative that we realize the importance of patient rebuilding. Give yourself time and develop a long-term perspective that will build solid foundation for many years to come… 

There’s a few things to focus on today. Tomorrow I will look at one of the most dangerous traps of transition: The Comparison Game

Advice for Veteran Youth Workers!

No matter how old you are or how long you’ve been in it, you are NOT obsolete or too old for youth ministry.  Never forget that.

1. You are a ‘real’ pastor.  Don’t lose sight of that when people ask you ‘when you’re moving up the ladder’ or ‘becoming a real pastor.’
2. Don’t get out of youth ministry because your body ‘can’t keep up with the kids anymore.’  Adapt.  Find new ways to connect with students – and find adult leaders who are ‘a little more spry’ to play basketball and run the lock-in.
3. If you haven’t already, start your ‘why I do this’ folder.  I’ve been keeping one since my first student ministry – pictures, thank you notes, letters, graduation announcements – I keep it all….like a memory hoarder.  On days when it doesn’t seem worth it, I pull out those albums and spend some time letting the Holy Spirit remind me why I continue to do this.
4. Find some hobbies outside of the youth ministry.  If you’ve been in youth ministry long enough to be considered ‘a veteran’, then you LOVE youth ministry.  Not in a newly infatuated date kind of way – but in a deep, abiding, agape kind of way.  Because of that, it can be easy to eat, drink, and sleep the student ministry that’s at your core…never turning off the youth ministry wheel whirring in your brain.  Find some things you like that help you unplug from student ministry – even if it’s just for a few hours.  It’ll keep your batteries recharged.

Embrace your call.  Don’t apologize for being a veteran – lean into your exceptional service.  Not many of us make it this far.  Enjoy it!

I’m not sure at what point you get to be considered a  “veteran”  youth worker.   Perhaps it is the point at which you realize you don’t really “know anything.”  Instead,  the “wisdom”  you have to share are the mistakes you have made.   I think it is the point at which you come to  the epiphany that you just want to be the person Jesus wants you to be.  Out of your great love for him all you can do is serve him.  As I am now considered a “veteran,”  here is what I would share with other “vet” youth people.

1. Don’t be afraid of change. I love to tell the story of the little girl who is watching her Mom fry a chicken.   Her Mom buys a whole chicken,  cuts off the legs and the wings and throws them away.  She proceeds to only fry the chicken breast.   “Mom,”  she asks,  “Why do you throw out part of  the chicken?  Why do you fry it like that?”  Her Mom responds,  “Honey,  I don’t know that’s how your grandmother taught me to do it,  ask her.”  So the little girl goes to her grandmother with the same question. The grandma responds,  “I don’t know that’s how your great- grandma taught me to do it, ask her.”  So the little girls asks the great –grandmother the same question.  The great- grandmother responds,  “That’s easy,  when I first started frying chicken I didn’t have a skillet that was big enough to fry it all in.  It took too long to fry the other pieces later so I threw them out.”    Do you see?  Two generations later a Mom is teaching her daughter to fry the chicken ineffectively,  based on an old standard.  In our own ministries we have to constantly evaluate why we do what we do.  Does it still work?  Does the group of kids I have respond to this?  Can my team buy in?  We must be wiling to shift and change our approach based on the team, parents and students we have NOW.

2. Keep growing and learning. Last week I had a conversation with a mentor who is “farther along” in ministry than I am.    He challenged me,  “Leneita when was the last time you went to a conference just to go.  Not where you are teaching,  but just to meet people and learn.”  In contrast I spoke with a 40 year vet last week who told me that conferences can’t really teach him anything anymore.  It is easy to become sucked into a myopic view of our  ministry.   There comes a point when it feels like there is “nothing new under the sun.”   That might be true,  yet we must recognize that the old dog sometimes needs to learn a new trick.   Perhaps a book or  event simply brings encouragement.  Mentors keep us accountable.  Growth keeps us humble.

3. Know when you are “called out.” There may come a point when the Lord is tugging at your heart to do “something else,” for and with him.  I once was told,  “It’s easy to hear the call into ministry, but too many times we ignore the Lord’s voice when he is calling us out.”  Be lead out before you are burnt out.   If you feel like your frustrations consistently outweigh your joys  in ministry it is time to seek Christ.  Does he need to readjust your heart?  Do you need to be doing “this” but somewhere else?  Does he have something entirely different for you to do?

4. Keep the Main thing, the Main thing. Yes a no brainer,  but I still think it is important to say.   We must avoid getting so caught up in the “polish” of ministry that we forget  “Who” wants our lives.

5. Redefine success. Too often we get to a certain “point” in ministry and we think that ministry should look a certain way.  I mean we have been doing this for X number of years so we should have something to show for it?   So what we do is try to reproduce models of ministry that we deem successful.  The Lord gave you a vision for the next generation.  We can take elements from other people- but we weren’t meant to mirror them.  The Lord gave  YOU a call.  When you are obedient to that out of a love for him,  that is success.

Finally,  I just want to say thanks.  The longer I stick it out as a “youth worker”  the less I have on this road that are ahead of me.  I heard the average  worker lasts about 18 months.   If you are veteran,  thanks.  I need some friends on the road with me.

What advice has helped you? 

Leneita